I've never purchased a pair of sweatpants before. Not in my life, not even when I lived in Chicago and froze every winter. I'm more of a dress and heels kind of gal, only recently balancing the closet out with a few more jeans (and then a couple more heels too). But as of today, I can no longer say that.
I've always been extremely hardheaded about doing what I want when I want. And that includes remaining active against my body's constant requests to take it easy and rest. It's hard to do when you don't want to give in, because it feels a little too like giving up. But after a day like yesterday when my body kept moving but my head checked out, I was forced to reconsider.
It's easy to blame everything on Celiac because ask around and you'll find others with this auto-immune disease suffering from the same thing, no matter the symptom. It's just that type of disease that affects so many aspects of your body and life. So, I don't know if it is or it isn't but becoming so severely foggy headed that you hear people and you see people but you can't interact is one of the many frustrating things that has been a part of this year for me. And it just so happened that this time I was at the gym with my boyfriend and good friend, both of which were concerned. I could hear a hushed conversation as I took my turn in the squat rack. I focused on the heavy bar on my neck. The mirror in front of me grew blurry as I went through my set. I couldn't make out their words but I knew they were still talking, talking about what might be wrong. I was only a few feet from them but I was miles away.
It was later that night after it finally passed that my boyfriend wrapped me in his arms and asked me to please slow down. We talked about how scary it is, for both of us to be standing physically close but mentally like I was on another planet.
So, this morning, for the first time in a long time, I slept in. Well... That's not entirely true. I woke up at seven after going to bed around 1am and was getting ready to get a run in. (What can I say, old habits die hard!). But I stopped and went back inside. I laid down and tried to go back to sleep. I didn't think it would work but at my boyfriend's request, I was going to TRY to give my body a break.
Of no surprise to anyone but myself, it did work. And I woke up feeling rested and entirely like my old self for the first time in a long time.
And so today, as I walking through a store looking for something else I passed a pair of "sweat pants". They called to me with their gray drawstring ELASTIC waist and pink painted flowers. They said, "We are just what you need today." And as I sit here, with no heels, no fuss and my flowered sweat pants as comfy as comfy could be I realize something. They were right.
Listening to the ones who love you, the boyfriends, the friends, the family is hard. It's hard to realize that sometimes you are not strong. Sometimes you need to take a break, not push harder. So from one stubborn minded person to any of you needing to hear it, do take care of yourself. And in case you are like me and just didn't realize it, sweat pants are, I mean really are, comfy.